El Criollo Loco: You'Ve Offically Been Shopped & Screwed

You'Ve Offically Been Shopped & Screwed

Knowing that PETA don't get along with my family, this is what you do, Nia? They keep takin' all the good jobs, huh, Nia? If it comforts you any, I mistook Tamala Jones for you earlier today.

Keep it moving, people.

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DISCLAIMER

This blog is satirical, or at least it tries to be. Using a fictional PERSONA we clown and wild out and pause and no homo and all that good shit. Even though it may seem like otherwise, I am not the real Julez. This is the part of the show where I tell you that this blog is not affiliated with the Knowles. Not Solange. Not Mathew. Not Julez. Not Beyonce. Not Tina. Maybe Kelly. No, just kidding. She's busy. Read that again with a straight face. So if you were wondering, it's not a Knowles affiliated site. And if Solange is reading this, sawwy! Like your hair.

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You'Ve Offically Been Shopped & Screwed

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