So I just got word that Toni Braxton has recently been hospitalized. I just want to go on record as saying I had nothing to do with this contrary to popular belief. I don't even know what the eff happened to her. Maybe she took a big whiff of that track & weave glue and fell the fluck out.

My best guess... she got news that my Tee-Tee and uncle got married and realized that her last shot at becoming famous or relevant again was out the door. Don't feel bad Toni. I'm pretty sure Brooke Valentine, T.Error Mari and all the other Undesirables attempted some sort of suicide following this news.

You are not alone.

Warning: I have the slight feeling that some of you may find this offensive. If you are a softie, easily offended, got an soft stomach, tender-headed or suffer from severe bitchassness (why Lord?) please step to the left and kill yourself.